Love...

Love... 

4 letters, 1 word but so many meanings.

Have you ever sat and wondered what is the meaning of love? Not the dictionary version, but the version inside your heart. The word love is thrown around so easily these days, especially with young people. You go out with a person for two weeks and you are all of a sudden ready to tell this person you love them? Look, I'm not saying it's not possible but rather I'm asking are you absolutely sure? Cause like any words, once it has been said, there is no taking it back. 

I've had my share of heartbreak, and not just your a quick two month relationship heartbreak. No, this heartbreak, broke not only my heart but my soul too.  He was the love of my life, the only man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Or so I thought. I think I was so blinded by my love for him that I didn't see the warning signs. But we were together for 3 years. There were incredible moments and not so incredible moments. He was my first everything, and those are the memories that I never wanna forget. What I do wanna forget, is the way he decided to walk away from me and our child.  I got pregnant unexpectedly and unplanned. I thought he would be happy but instead he told me that if I wanted him in my life, I would have an abortion. Those words, to this day, shatter my heart into a million pieces. Here was the man that I loved, telling me to abort a poor innocent child, cause he wasn't ready. Hell, I wasn't ready but there was no way I was going to give up my child. 

I left the next day and not once did he try to stop me. The thing I'm trying to explain with this story is that even though I loved him with every fiber in my being, he didn't. Even though he said it. That's the thing, no matter how much you love someone, you will never know exactly how much they love you. And almost always, it will never be the same.  Do I believe he didn't love me? No, I just think he didn't love me the same way I loved him. 

So please, with Valentines day on the horizon, be sure before you tell someone you love them. Make sure they feel the same. Make sure in your heart that what you feel for this person is love and not just lust and liking. Ask yourself the following questions... Do you see yourself living with this person for the next 50 years? Having kids with person? Or do you see yourself with someone else in 3 years time? 

I believe everyone in the world has a soul mate, I'm just not one of those people who believes you need to jump from one person to the next to find them. I believe putting myself in the right situations, being around the right kinda people, and that way I will find my soul mate.